#I’m sorry I was bored

[okthumbsupemoji]

@vicagentstan

I shall gift you with vicagent

[weird-gay-fan-frog]

F*ck you *McDonalds your AiKado*

[nothingbutloveforyou]

i want to be loved like the women i read about. like i’m the person they would do anything for. the person they look for in everyone else and everywhere they go because they can’t get her out of their heads. the person their entire being burns for. the person they are patient with, even when she’s rambling, being emotional or sick. the person they go out of their way for, over and over again, because it’s her. the person they love. the person they… love and keep loving.

[dingledraw]

It’s them

Wait, Jane Austen wrote books?

[blackberry-s0da]

Mercy waiting for me to give him any sort of story that doesn’t involve him lingering naked in an invisible background

[nicossunshine]

“Jason was so boring” “Jason had no personality” what are you talking about

Jason Grace was a child soldier and the son of the KING OF THE GODS. The pressure on him was so huge and the training of the Roman legions was so intense all he ever really did was train. As soon as he was old enough he was put in positions of leadership and power cause he’s the son of Jupiter, leader of the gods, he must be a natural born leader, right?

But his entire character arc revolves around him realising that he can be more than what the Romans made him into, that he can have his own opinions, his own hobbies, love who he wants, live where he wants.

He was the first person to start defending Nico, the first to accept Nico and tell him sincerely that there was nothing wrong with him and that everyone at BOTH camps would accept him and have his back - and if they didn’t they’d have Jason to answer to.

He was sure to always give Reyna the credit she deserved and constantly felt guilty for when he made her shoulder the responsibilities. Throughout HoH he’s got half of his mind on her, praying she’s okay, tracking her progress in his dreams because gods FORBID anything happen to that brilliant woman whom he loved platonically but wholeheartedly.

When they found Leo again after he was at Ogygia, Jason recognised in an instant just from the way Leo was sitting that something was off. When everyone pestered him with questions, Jason took charge to get the limelight off of Leo as much as possible, and checked in with him the minute they were alone.

Jason Grace is fiercely loving, always looks out for those who need support, always sides with the underdogs, always does what’s right even when it’s hard, often does what’s expected even when he doesn’t want to, but if he can take the burden off of someone else he will ALWAYS step up.

He has the honour and bravery of a soldier and carries all of the trauma and doubt that comes with it.

And on top of all of this he was just sixteen years old.

Jason Grace isn’t boring, it just took some time for us to understand why he acts the way he does - always composed and in charge. He is not perfect, but he was always trained/expected to be, and watching the perfect mask crack and seeing his true inner thoughts throughout HoO is what makes his character so interesting.

[repugnantbeast]

Damn.

[moneyndior]

luke castellan who absolutely looks and holds you like it’s the last time.

he observes—no, memorizes each perfection in your face. the colour of your eyes, your nose shape, how your lips slightly pierce together under an awkward situation and how your gaze softens when you look at him. he’s almost got you down to the last molecule.

luke doesn’t understand how nobody else can tell when you’re uncomfortable. it’s so obvious by the way your eyes drop in the this-is-too-much-for-me way and not the usual i-got-2-hours-of-sleep way. luke doesn’t understand why people still go up to you and ask you to help them when your shoulders are tense—which is the biggest indicator that you’re angry.

annabeth just says it’s because he’s in love, he says it’s just because you’re you. he tries to understand you so you don’t have to. luke understands that you like to cuddle this specific way and not the other way.

he sees your eyes shine just before you’re about to fall asleep—as if it’s the final warning to tell you that he loves you more than anything before you fall unconscious. luke’s tight grip doesn’t lessen as your breathing falls into a rhythm, his fingers entangled with yours as he had a hand on your hip and his chin resting at the top of your head.

luke has gotten every inch of you memorized. he’s preparing for the day that it will be his last day looking up at you, his head resting on your lap. he’s making sure he’s ready for you to be his last sight—and he’s making sure he remembers everything. he cannot pass on without memorizing how you try your best to smile to bring him comfort when you’re crying.

he’s making sure he doesn’t regret a thing.

[secriden]

It flays me open to see the way Style is so clearly choosing to love Fadel. The way he does this with eyes wide open, fully seeing and knowing and understanding that Fadel is very much a man with parts at war within himself, who is far from perfect and moreover who will stubbornly cling to his flawed perspectives -- and yet Style chooses and keeps choosing to love Fadel anyway.

And while there is a helplessness to Fadel's love for Style, it is juxtaposed so very beautifully with the way Style's love for Fadel is filled with intention.

It's kind of wonderful how there's nothing idealistic about Style's perception of Fadel. Watch how long Style freezes when Fadel first pulls the gun on Popcorn and Jimmy. Even as they're starting to run away, Style remains petrified, his whole focus fixed on Fadel's hand, on the gun with a (steady, this time) finger on the trigger.

And again, when Fadel threatens to shoot Jimmy, Style's whole body actually jerks in alarm, hands hovering as if he's caught in indecision, before he stands up and tries to physically stay Fadel's hand. Style is acutely aware of the violence that Fadel is capable of and it legitimately terrifies him. Not just because of the physical training that makes Fadel so effortlessly, instinctively lethal, but even more what it says about his metal state and the emotional scars he carries to be able to hurt without thought or care.

It's easy to forget that Style's boldness and defiance in the face of Fadel's threats does not mean that he is unaware or in denial about the deaths which Fadel has orchestrated and been involved with. The choice to keep Popcorn and Jimmy alive is only significant if Style understood that Fadel was fully capable of clinical murder given the justification of being attacked by them.

He's also unflinchingly honest about questioning if Fadel's moral judgement is one that should be trusted. And even more significant is that he calls out how wrong it is that Fadel thinks he has the right to stand as judge and jury at all. It’s kind of wonderful how Style’s love not only doesn’t blind him to Fadel’s faults, it even makes him see the situation more clearly because he so genuinely wants what is best for Fadel.

And we find out this episode that Style is absolutely right to ask those questions!! Fadel has been lied to, used, manipulated; but there's an undeniable aspect of Fadel on some subconscious level choosing to turn a blind eye and trust that Lilly was giving them the 'right' targets in spite of the fact that he knows Lilly isn't a good woman (because we've seen Fadel's fear of her in the way he tries to protect Bison from their 'loving' mother). I remember wondering in episode 1 if the supposedly ethical 'cause' is one which Fadel truly believes in, and I think the fact that he has already tried to leave once tells us that on some level, a quiet voice inside Fadel whispered that there was a falseness at the centre of his crusade.

But the Fadel of right now isn't willing to face this truth just yet. He is still reeling from the discovery of Style and Bison’s double betrayals, still hurting from what he thinks is his unreciprocated love. Right now, Fadel still wants, still needs to feel like he has some control, still needs the wilful self-deception of thinking that his life before Style (without Style) was enough to make him happy. And Fadel would rather pay the price of loneliness (and continuing to hurt someone he knows he still loves) if it means feeling as if the ground he's standing on is solid.

But Fadel has never prepared for someone coming into his life with not only the unwavering determination to look beyond his mask of hostility, but also the ravenous desire and tender care to search and reach for the soft fragility of the light inside his heart. Because as much as Style was challenging and questioning Fadel in this scene, he was also so very clear about the things he sees in Fadel that are worth treasuring. Just look at the gentleness in Style's eyes and the soft way he says "you're pretty decent at your core". The way Style refuses to let Fadel maintain his facade of careless cruelty and clinical detachment to killing, but claims with unshakable certainty that Fadel has never been that self-serving as to kill solely for money.

Style desperately wants Fadel to see the good in himself and to understand and acknowledge that he is so very, very worthy of the adoration Style wants to give him. Can we just pause and take in for a moment: the weight of Style's affection as he presses worshipful kisses to Fadel's injured arm; a silent apology for the hurts already inflicted and wordless promise to care for all of Fadel's injuries in the future.

Style (rock concert; episode 6): "You're doing a lot of second jobs aren't you?" and "Try being someone you want to be."

But Stye's love for Fadel also gives him the courage want better for Fadel. He isn't content to just accept Fadel's life as a hitman; and now that all the secrets are gone, he dares to bluntly ask the questions that he had to hide behind veiled words in episode 6. Style is determined to hold a mirror up to the life Fadel has been living and force Fadel to see the ways it has been eating Fadel up on the inside.

Style is forcing Fadel to face the reality that he does have a choice, that he has options outside of merely surviving this horrible life he feels bound to by fate. (And once again he is right!! Because oh, the harrowing knowledge we, as the audience, now have that it wasn't even fate -- it was the machinations of an evil, scheming, conniving woman who took two grieving and traumatised children and twisted them for her own use! T_T).

But the best part? The part that absolutely fills me with an almost hysterical delight? Style makes it absolutely clear that he isn't asking Fadel to face any of this alone. Because Style understands that Fadel is genuinely terrified -- Style is asking for Fadel to reach for a future together with him beyond this life of a killer, to step off the edge and choose to trust Style again when neither of them know what they'll find at the bottom of that fall.

So Style takes that drop first because what Style does this episode makes me truly feel insane:

He freely calls Fadel faen and owns the unspoken implications of love, commitment, and devotion in that term of address. He promises, over and over that he won't run from Fadel; that his continued presence by Fadel's side is a choice and not a reaction to the gun Style is careful to show he is not intimidated by. He stays unflinchingly honest in everything he does throughout their journey: from his frank desire for Fadel's kiss, to the harrowing vulnerability of his very real fear of death; from the way he obeys Fadel's order to push the car, and also how exhausted he was from the exertion, to the way he stares at the water Fadel is drinking and pointedly says nothing (refuses to ask for any water himself) and then calls out that Fadel offered it to him without prompting.

Style wants Fadel to know that he's seeing everything, that he can hear the silent cries of reluctant care from Fadel's heart, even if Fadel's words are still filled with cold and cruel dismissals, because it makes Style's declarations of love and devotion all the more weighty.

When Style said, "I promise that no matter who you are, I'll still like you" in episode 5, Fadel couldn't trust his words because he didn't have the context of Style already Knowing. But Style has been freed from the shackles of his own lies now; freed to give his promises to Fadel anew with the knowledge that both their secrets have already been stripped bare.

And this time, Style fully respects the boundaries Fadel sets, and acknowledges the storm of anger and hurt in his heart. He isn't demanding for Fadel's forgiveness, nor is he denying that Fadel feels that he deserves recompense.

I remember reading a few takes that Style is simply "restarting" or "continuing" his courtship and episode 8 has totally shifted my perspective on that.

This courtship isn't a parallel, this is a juxtaposition; and the biggest indication of that is the way Style refuses to take anything that Fadel does not give him freely. Style will put himself on display, will offer is body and his heart and ask for Fadel's touch, Fadel's lips, Fadel's heart -- but yet at each crucial moment when Fadel rejects him or turns away, Style's reaction is only one of understanding and compassion and acceptance. Look at the stark difference in these two moments. Look at Style's selfish determination to take in episode 2 as compared to his selfless acceptance of Fadel's right to reject his offer of affection in episode 8.

Because this time his love is real. This time, it's not just empty words dangled to bait a trap accidentally designed to work uniquely for Fadel's fragile heart. This time, Style will place all of his vulnerability in Fadel's hands and take the risk that Fadel will hurt him, that Fadel will be cruel to him, hell that Fadel may actually still kill him at the end of their journey, because Style has made the choice to put Fadel's happiness first. And this is so fucking incredible because I don't think Fadel has had anyone to do that for him since his parents died. Khun Mae certainly didn't, and Bison is his younger brother and the one Fadel has to care for, the one he's responsible for. Who, then, has been around to truly look at Fadel, to see into his heart and the things he desires in his darkest moments, and give him not only what he thinks he wants, but what is best for him?

But the beauty of their narrative is that love has given Style eyes to see true; to see behind Fadel's walls and masks and cruel facade, to the heart of the a man who is still bound up in his trauma and old hurts and isn't ready to let go of his past for the future Style wants to offer him. And all that he saw was worth enough that even with Fadel's gun at hand, even with Fadel sitting literally naked and vulnerable and partially incapacitated because of his broken arm, Style's choice is still to stay.

And I am brought to my knees by this choice because it isn't a thoughtless or careless one: Style literally vows to give his life on his quest to win Fadel back. This is a promise to stay by Fadel side until Fadel either kills him or becomes ready to walk away from his life of violence, because they both know now that these are the only options left.

But Style sees enough in Fadel to make wagering his very life worthwhile, because there's no price Style isn't willing to pay if it means the chance to hold Fadel in his arms again and receive a kiss freely given from the lips of the man he loves.

[legolambi]

[penumbra-mayhem]

(EDIT) TW: domestic violence, abusive relationship

In my personal hc, Quinn and Tank didn’t have a “brief dalliance”. They dated for much longer than in canon, like at least a year.

Gabe’s death hits Tank hard. He was practically their adopted father and was one of the only people looking out for them. Then Tank’s family moves to Washington, and Tank is left alone, for all intents and purposes.

They meet Quinn soon after. It’s a “friendship” that quickly evolves into something more complicated. Quinn is a masterful manipulator, and he reads people very well. He can see how isolated Tank is, with no outlet for their grief or self loathing. He knows he can use this to his advantage.

However, he can also see that Tank has strong morals. They are loyal to a fault and have a resolute sense of justice. Quinn knows he has to play his cards right. He can’t reveal his true nature to them until they are so tightly wrapped around his finger that they can’t bear to let him go.

So he lures them in. He lets them be wild and messy. The two of them break social rules and engage in taboo activities, like feeding. They’re reckless, but they don’t hurt anyone (other than themselves). Quinn only brings Tank into certain crowds, only lets them see certain sides of himself.

Then he starts to hurt Tank. They take it because they’re “tough”, and they think they deserve it. The abuse worsens. The pack starts to get concerned. In response, Tank pulls away. They don’t want the pack to be concerned or get involved. Tank accepts Quinn’s behavior because his cruelty is only directed at them.

Eventually, Quinn brings them into his innermost circle. He stops hiding his criminal activities. He stops hiding how he hurts people. He lets them see how inhumane he is, believing Tank is too far in and too loyal and too damaged to ever defy him.

But Tank is a good person. Despite what Quinn tells them. Despite what Tank believes. They have a good heart and care for others deeply. So when they see Quinn’s true colors, they report him and leave.

And Tank thinks that makes them weak. But it’s one of the strongest things they’ve ever done.

[the-stag-and-the-dog]

Will: I'm gonna need a human skull but you can't ask why. Hannibal: Only if you also don't ask why. Hannibal: pulls four pristine human skulls out of his bag Will: … Will, grabbing a skull: This one will do.

[w2nv]

Hi

[cultivating-wildflowers]

and I’ll read it again!

[intricate-ritualz]

rip edwin payne you would’ve loved downloading a 10k word slowborn fic onto your kindle fire and pretending you were reading a book

rip edwin payne you would’ve loved correcting peoples grammar when you start to lose an argument online

rip charles rowland you would’ve loved horny horror movie fandoms

rip charles rowland you would’ve loved asking people to “name five songs”

rip crystal palace you would’ve loved shit talking taylor swift and then turning around and listening to her music in secret

rip crystal palace you would’ve loved shoplifting from hobby lobby

rip niko sasaki you would’ve loved misusing the word “twink”

rip niko sasaki you would’ve loved having a concerningly large squishmallow collection

[andromeddog]

another speirs + timelapse under the cut